In the last few years
I have blissfully turned nocturnal and accepted the drapes of darkness for they
are the best at concealing my naïveté of youth. Draining, dreary, and downright
depressing the journey to the completion of my course wore striking resemblance
to the climb of a volcanic mountain, the climb becomes harder and more
treacherous, but you just console yourself reminding that this is the end and
certainly it is.
“Tonight we have a party”
I opened my eyes like
an owl in the sun shine only to see a silhouette. Sometimes in extremely rare
moments of absolute solitude we introspect ourselves only to discover that the
societal standards that are steadfastly ingrained in our psyches are still
rather predictable, conservative, and normative.
Well tonight we have a
party and these can be rather irritating at times, the banter of a nosy
relative or well-meaning friend, I have recently noticed how awfully sinister,
how awfully narrow-minded and rife with victim-blaming they can be.
I mounted myself
comfortably in the bus, but my eyes are sleepy, there is no one to gaze at, no
one to praise the color of my eyes, or notice the unibrow which some stamp as a
sign of a short temper. Even my dreams are so hopeless so gloomy and disdain.
Sometimes I wonder what if all the world was blind, there wouldn't be a word
blind. Everybody would be beautiful. We would recognize everybody by the sense
of touch, no distinction of a white or a black man There would be no light no
darkness, it would have been much better. Still here I am stuck in this colorful
world, everybody with eyes but no vision, I want to see someone and let myself
be seen. Alas I am in a colorful world. No wonder I am sleepy.
“We are here dude!
Eat, drink, dance and be merry, have the time of your life”
I woke up again. I
abominate it. Why do I wake up? May be because Eros trumps all! This place is
perfect, just like the night I love, with untimed random flashes which
constantly remind me of the day and how I loath it. My eyes are still heavy but
now I am determined.
There is commotion on
the dance floor. Every little soul is enjoying, trying hard to keep pace with
the beats. It’s futile, otiose and abortive. Solitude and loneliness can call
up some of our deepest fears and sorrows.
